Speechless in motherhood

[at grocery store]

Jacob: mom … she only has one arm!!! …..

Mom … and you have two arms.

Jacob: But mom, that looks weird!!!

[speechless]

[to primary teacher the week after we stayed home cause I was sick]

We didn’t go to church last week cause mom was too busy killing zombies on the computer ….

…

[to Megan while she’s coloring]

Me: what do you do with legs?

Megan: walk

Me: what do you do with noses?

Megan: color them!!

Me: what else do you do with noses?

Megan: bite them!!!

Me: Ben; you're a dork.

Megan: You're a dork.

Ben: Laura, look what you're teaching her.

Me: I'm sorry daddy.

Megan: [looking at me] you're not sorry.

Ben: [laughing]

[kids playing, suddenly they start an insult war]

Brandon: you’re a bubblenose!!

Jacob: Mommy, he called me a bubblenose!!!!

Jacob: mommy, I’m sweeping the roof for you!!

Me: Is it dirty?

Jacob: Someday walked on it with muddy feet!

Me: … OK?

Jacob: Mommy … can we watch “Casper the holy ghost?”

Me: who lost their underwear in the box of pears?

Ben: It fell out of the clean laundry as I was taking it out of the dryer.

Making decisions;

me- what do you think?

ben- it's up to you. me- no, it's up to you.

jacob in backseat- no guys. it's up to BOTH of you.

raining today.

jacob said "mother, can you find something to clean the windshield so i can see?"

i turned on the wipers "good thinking mother!"

Ah, the life of a mother. :-)